I'm so sorry for everything

I think I have a bad habit of disappearing sometimes, to slip away unknowingly from a room or a crowd, and retreat into a hidden place on my own. It's disconcerting I know, and I apologise to all my friends who have had to look around for me frantically. I really should show a little discipline. Or disappear more gracefully, like in the Secret Meeting by The National.

I loved this song from the first time I heard it, even though I thought he was a bit neurotic, or maybe especially so.

I think this place is full of spies
I think they're onto me
Didn't anybody, didn't anybody tell you
Didn't anybody tell you how to gracefully disappear in a room

I know you put in the hours to keep me in sunglasses, I know
And so and now I'm sorry I missed you
I had a secret meeting in the basement of my brain

It went the dull and wicked ordinary way
It went the dull and wicked ordinary way
And now I'm sorry I missed you
I had a secret meeting in the basement of my brain

I think this place is full of spies
I think I'm ruined
Didn't anybody, didn't anybody tell you
Didn't anybody tell you, this river's full of lost sharks

The National | Secret Meeting



I think one of the things I like about The National is how the songs are so propulsive, and yet persistent. And how they can just repeat a line in the song, and it never gets too much, just more poignant. It's so easy to trigger a memory that way.

All night I lay on my pillow and pray
For my boss to stop me in the hallway
Lay my head on his shoulder and say
Son, I've been hearing good things
I wake up without warning and go flying around the house
In my sauvignon fierce, freaking out
Take a forty-five minute shower and kiss the mirror

And say, look at me
Baby, we'll be fine
All we gotta do is be brave and be kind
I put on an argyle sweater and put on a smile
I don't know how to do this

I'm so sorry for everything

Baby, come over, I need entertaining
I had a stilted, pretending day
Lay me down and say something pretty
Lay me back down where I wanted to stay
Just say something perfect, something I can steal

Say, look at me
Baby, we'll be fine
All we've gotta do is be brave and be kind
I pull off your jeans, and you spill jack and coke in my collar
I melt like a witch and scream

I'm so sorry for everything



The National | Baby We'll Be Fine

Can't stream this one so here's one from their EP album I like.